Goodbye

Since I posted my last post, I've been trying to think of ways I might be able to continue the blog and keep posting for at least a little while. What can I say, I've gotten kind of attached to it. But unfortunately, I couldn't seem to think of anything. I've already covered all I can possibly think of on the subject of desserts for bachelorette parties. Except candy, of course, but I think that would be kind of redundant after showing you that other blog. Maybe I shouldn't have picked such a specific topic, haha. I've enjoyed taking up blogging as a new hobby though, and I think I just might have gotten hooked on it! So maybe I'll start a new blog now... I don't know what it would be about, but I'll think about it! If I do decide to make a new blog, I'll definitely post a link to it here so that I can keep what few readers I probably have, haha. But if I'm not able to keep going with a new blog, because of work or whatever, then it's been a great time. I hope some of you got some good ideas for your bachelorette parties from my blog so it's not like I was doing this for nothing - oh, who am I kidding, I'd probably do it anyways. It's been fun, everyone, and I'll talk to you later (hopefully!)

Other Blogs

So, today I got some time to make a blog post again, and I was thinking I would continue on the trend of drinks that I've had at bachelorette parties that I think would make good after-dinner cocktails. But before I got around to posting about it, I was looking around on the internet at other blogs, and I came across two in particular that struck me as very relevant to, well, this blog. One was especially relevant to the post I was planning to make. I guess I should just show you. This is the first blog I found. And as you can see... it pretty much eliminates the need for me to post any more about drinks. Just look at it, I mean, wow. That's a lot of drinks on that site, supposedly all good for bachelorette parties. That woman is a real expert when it comes to drinks, and it reminded me that my area of expertise is baking, not bartending! So maybe I should leave the recommending drinks to her. I encourage all of you to check her blog out!

The other blog that I found was this one. It's a lot like my blog, it looks like, except instead of cakes it talks about candy. Who knew there were so many blogs about penis-themed food and drinks out there? Or even specifically penis-themed desserts, for that matter! It looks like she hasn't updated her blog since october and doesn't plan to again, but still, it was interesting to read the posts that she does have. I had no idea there was so much penis candy out there! I mean, I probably could have guessed, but it was cool to see all of it one place.

Now, as cool as it was to find those other blogs and see that I'm not the only person blogging about something as silly as this, it made me realize that I really don't know how to keep this blog up much longer. I'm going to try to think of something else I could talk about, but it seems like I've said just about all there is to say about penis party desserts - and those other blogs have said the rest. I'll give some thought to it and get back to you, but preemptively, it's looking like my next post might be my goodbye. :( But I'll talk to you then!

More Drinks

Okay, I think posting about drinks last time was a pretty good idea, and I didn’t get any comments otherwise, so I’m going to do it again this time! I thought of two more drinks that make good bachelorette party after-dinner cocktails. And what I mean by that is, I know I’ve drank them at a bachelorette party after dinner before and I thought they tasted good! So, here they are!

Fuzzy Lips
1 part Bailey’s Irish Cream
1 part Peach Schnapps
Splash of pineapple juice
Shake them together with ice then pour them into a glass.

Banana Daiquiri
4 parts Light Rum
1 part White Crème de Cacao
1 part Banana Liqueur
1 slice Banana
Blend all the ingredients together in a blender then pour them into a glass. It will be like an alcoholic smoothie or slushie!

I like both of these drinks pretty well, but my best friend absolutely looooves banana daiquiris, and this is her favorite recipe for them. So you can imagine, it’s really good! Oh, and if you’re looking for something appropriate to drink it out of, check out this classy glass I found:

It’s a martini glass, but with a little veil attached to it. How cute is that? I just found that and thought it looked absolutely perfect as a glass to serve drinks in at a bachelorette party. And it’s a good classy counterpart to those penis shot glasses I posted about last time, haha! There is some really cute and fun looking drinkware for bachelorette parties out there, maybe I’ll post about my favorites that I find next time… along with some more drink recipes!

Dessert Drinks

I liked that idea I had last time about posting after-dinner cocktails (because that’s sort of like a dessert, right?) so that’s what I’m going to do this time! These are a couple of my favorite after-dinner drinks, and they would go great at a bachelorette party - especially because of their names! Here they are, these are two of my favorites!

Screaming Orgasm
1 shot Vodka
1 shot Amaretto
1 shot Kahlua
1 part light cream
Shake them together and pour them into a glass.

Blowjob
1 oz Kahlua
1/2 oz Frangelico
Mix and pour them into a shot glass and top it with whipped cream.

What can I say, I love Kahlua! I thought I’d post one full size cocktail and one shot for the sake of variety. But of course I know more drinks than that that have gone over well at bachelorette parties! So if you want me to post more maybe I will, but here are these in the mean time. Oh, also, I found this and it’s related so I just had to share it:

That site sells all kinds of penis shot glasses! But these have got to be the coolest ones there. I don’t understand how you even pour a shot in there without spilling, but the customer reviews are good so I guess it must all work out! I think this would be a great thing to take the blowjob shot out of - that would make it even more authentic to its name, haha! Okay, that’s all for now, I’ll post some more drinks next time if you guys want me too!

Penis Straws

Okay, I’m sorry to say that I haven’t gotten a chance to make my own giant gummy penis yet - it takes a lot more time and work than you might think, and I just haven’t been able to! I still want to get around to it eventually, but it might not be for a while, so in the mean time, I’m back to not really knowing what to post about. Well, except for today, I did already find something I wanted to post about. It’s another website that I stumbled upon while I was surfing the web, and it’s a liiiittle related to the theme of my blog, sort of. Instead of giant gummy penises, this time what I found was a website about penis-shaped straws! Okay, other than the shape of them, I don’t know how exactly these relate to my blog, but just look a them! How fun are these?

I think those are my favorite ones on the site but there’s plenty of others there and I don’t think I saw all of them. I guess I stopped looking at the site after a while because I felt kind of bad about how it doesn’t really have anything to do with my blog... Oh, wait a minute! I had an idea. Maybe I could make a post about my favorite after dinner cocktails - that still counts as a dessert, right? And it totally fits in with the bachelorette party penis theme if you use straws like those! So maybe that’s what I’ll post about next time, what do you think?

Gummy Penis!

Aha! It looks like I’m not the only person on the internet blogging about penis-shaped desserts after all! Okay, well, the thing I found isn’t really a blog. It looks more like an informative site, which is even weirder! But look at this! The website is here: http://www.gummypenis.com/
Did you check it out? It’s an entire website about making a giant gummy penis! And just look at the thing!

It looks like it’s sponsored by that bachelorette party website or associated with them or something because it says so on the bottom of the site, so I guess it’s not just a random person on the internet like me, but still, I thought it was pretty cool! I have to say I like that website even more now that I know they share my passion for penis-shaped desserts, haha! But I have to say I never would have thought of making a penis-shaped gummy. You know cakes and chocolates are my thing, and I even thought of jello shots, but this is a great idea that never even occurred to me. And you know now that I’ve found out about it I’ve got to try and make one for myself now! It lists the ingredients and instructions on their website here, so I think I’ll pick some of these things up next time I go to the grocery. And when I make my own giant gummy penis, I’ll let you know!

Funny "Diets?"

Okay, okay, first I want to say that I’m sorry I haven’t figured out what I’m going to start blogging about now. I’ve been really busy with work lately and haven’t had a whole lot of personal free time for things like this. But I don’t want to go too long without posting or I know I’ll never get back to it, so in the mean time, until I figure out what to post about regularly, I’m just going to post funny and interesting things I find on the web. Today I’m just going to post a couple of funny links to that fad diet website I mentioned last time. I was browsing around it, like I said I might, and I recognized most of the diets they talked about, but these two caught my eye as a little strange.
Cookie Diet
Chocolate Diet
Yeah. You can tell from the names that something’s a little weird, right? Well I looked at them and it looks like they’re actually legitimate diets that just include a few things diets normally don’t. Darn. I was really hoping it was a way to lose weight by eating nothing but cookies! I think even I could subscribe to a diet plan like that, haha! Maybe I should design my own: the penis-shaped cake diet! Haha, okay, maybe not. Anyways, I’ll keep looking for another topic and other funny or interesting stuff to post. I have a feeling some more of it might come from that fad diet website - there’s some weird stuff on there!

-Olivia

Interesting Video!

So I’m still trying to figure out something else to blog about.... so in the mean time, I’ve been doing some online exploring! It turns out that that website I’ve been finding so many things at is connected to a whole bunch of other websites that are all run by the same company. And through their sites I found out that they have a youtube channel with some funny or interesting videos. Most of them are about pumpkins for some reason but this was my favorite one that I found.

That video is from their website faddiet.com which is all about different diets. Maybe that’s what I could move onto, diet tips. It would be like moving from fatty food to healthy food! Although I actually don’t know that much about dieting... it’s been a long time since I tried one of those! So maybe I’m not the best person to talk about that but I thought this video was really interesting - I never knew anything about those diets, and it sounds like most of them don’t really work after all! Anyways, I’m going to keep thinking of what to start posting about next. Maybe looking at all these other websites will give me some ideas! See you next time!

-Olivia

Jello Shots

Okay, by now you’ve probably figured out the sad truth: I’m running out of things to post about! I thought there would be more I could say about penis-shaped desserts for bachelorette parties... but it seems like there isn’t! Even jello shots is a bit of a stretch to call them dessert, but I guess you kind of could. Jello’s a dessert. I really want to keep this blog going, so I’m going to have to think about what other kinds of things I could post about, though. But in the mean time, this post is about jello shots!

How do you make jello shots? Well first you need a mold, of course! And just like every other dessert, there’s a penis-shaped mold out there, just perfect for bachelorette parties!

So, now, how do you make them? It’s actually really easy! You just make your jello normally like it says on the instructions, using the warm cup of water like normal, but replace the cold cup of water with vodka! For every standard 3 oz pack of jello there should be about 12 shots worth of vodka in the mixture. If you were pouring the jello into regular plastic shot cups you’d want about 1/2 a shot per cup, but since these molds are bigger, you should get a full shot in every penis mold. Put them in the freezer like normal jello, and voila, penis-shaped jello shots! It’s a yummy dessert and it’s alcoholic, it’s like the best of both worlds, haha! If you’ve got any questions all you have to do is ask! Okay, that’s it for now, now I’m going to go try and think of what to start posting about next!

-Olivia

A little bit of everything

So, if you’ve been reading this blog, you know there’s plenty of penis-shaped dessert tools out there, from cake pans to lollipop molds to cookie cutters. If you saw that one fairly immature post of mine (which I kind of hope you didn’t) you know there’s also no shortage of boob-shaped similar tools. So if you want desserts that look like either of those things, the internet’s got you covered. But what if you want both? Maybe it’s for a Jack & Jill party where you do the bachelorette and bachelor parties together, or maybe you’re a bunch of girls who just want to eat little chocolate boobs as much as chocolate dicks. I was thinking about that, and I looked around, and sure enough, there are some sets that come with both shapes. So here they are.

First, if you want cookies, I found a set of cookie cutters that comes with two penis-shaped cutters and one boobs-shaped.

But if you were a fan of the chocolate lollipops I posted a while back, well, you’re in luck too, because I also found this mold for both penis and boob-shaped lollipops.

So that covers the smaller desserts. If you want two cakes, one of each um “gender” well, you’ll just have to buy the two separate cake pans (or get really creative with pans you already have). But that’s not too bad. But if you want both kinds of cookies or chocolate lollipops, hopefully these will work for you. I thought it was a pretty good find, I just hope there are some of you out there who can appreciate a little gender neutrality in your risque desserts, haha!

-Olivia

Weird Cake Pan

Okay, I know you might be looking at that title and thinking it’s kind of odd or inappropriate. Who am I to call a cake pan weird, if I love making cakes shaped like penises? Well, just bear with me. If you can believe it, I think you’ll find this one even more disturbing than the idea of a penis cake pan. Ta-da:

Yeah. Look at that bizarre-looking thing. And the worst (or best) part is, they call it the “sexy man cake pan.” I don’t know, if you ask me, that man’s anything but sexy. Look at how deformed the face is. All his “muscles” look like mush. And it looks like he has the groin area of a ken doll. I don’t know whose definition of sexy that is, but it isn’t mine. Then again, I suppose you can smooth all of that out by baking and frosting the cake. It would probably look better as a finished dessert than as a pan. Still, unless you’re a master artist with the frosting brush, I don’t know how you could make this thing look remotely attractive... but hey, it’s an option, I guess, so when I saw it I thought I’d post it. Also, the one feedback it has does give a pretty good suggestion - you could frost it with clothes to make it suitable (no pun intended!) for a party where you don’t want any penises or anything. So maybe there is something that can be done to redeem this guy. If any of you have any other ideas, go ahead and share them!

-Olivia

Candles

Happy holidays everyone! I was baking a cake for a New Year’s party I’m going to (that’s right, bachelorette parties aren’t the only ones I’m known for baking for!) and I figured out what I could make this post about. Last time I promised to start talking about cakes again, but I was honestly having trouble coming up with a topic for my next post. Well, this isn’t about making the cake itself, but it’s something very important for any good cake: candles! And naturally, if you’re baking a penis-shaped cake, there’s only one kind of candle you can use. You guessed it!


Penis-shaped! These are just two options to choose from, but there’s plenty more out there I’m sure. Here’s the link to the first and to the second. Penis-shaped candles are really the obvious thing to put on a penis-shaped cake, but even if you have a regular cake (maybe you were too embarrassed to have a penis-shaped cake pan lying around the house) you can add these to make it more fun and in the spirit of the party. I’ve found that girls (at least my friends) find the candles especially funny because they get to make jokes about burning the little penises. Whether your friends are prone to that sort of humor or not, they’ll at least find these candles funny, no matter what you cake is shaped like, so I definitely recommend these!

-Olivia

Ice Cube Tray

Okay, I know, this is getting even farther away from cakes now. This isn’t even a dessert thing. But it’s another penis-shaped food (or drink as the case may be) item that I thought of that I’ve used before and I thought it would be worth mentioning here on the blog. Okay, you already know what I’m talking about from the title, so I’ll cut to the chase:

Yup, penis-shaped ice cube trays. These are great for making ice cubes for drinks to serve at your bachelorette party. I’ve only hosted a few parties before (most of the time I was just in charge of the cake for another girl planning the party), but I used these and they went over really well. This isn’t exactly the tray I used but I couldn’t find the one I used online and this one looked pretty good. And this comes with 2 trays of 8 ice cubes each, so if you get a couple of these and freeze ice a couple of times before the party you should be all set. Plus, the name of this is really clever and funny - blue balls, haha! Classic.
I also found this one which makes more detailed ice cubes but they’re smaller I guess.

But I thought I’d post it for variety of options. Anyways, sorry about this deviation from the topic that the blog is supposed to be about, but I hope it helped. I’ll get back to tips for penis-shaped cakes next time, I promise!

-Olivia

Chocolate Penis Pops

Today, we’re going to depart even farther from cakes - this time it’s not even technically a baked good! But it’s still a penis-shaped dessert that’s tasty and great for bachelorette parties, so I guess it fits under what this blog’s all about. This is an easy one to make that can be used as a finger food-type dessert for a little variety. Have you ever seen those baking chocolates at the grocery and wondered what they were for? Or maybe you know that you can use them to make molded chocolate snacks. Well, I bet you didn’t know (although you probably guessed) that you can use them to make chocolate penises on sticks! It’s actually really easy to do. All you need is a mold and some baking chocolates to melt down. You can find the chocolate at any grocery store (I’ve even seen it at a craft store that had a baking section before), but the penis-shape mold might be a little harder to find. Here’s a good one:

All you have to do is melt the chocolate down, fill the mold, stick some lollipop sticks in (you can also find these where you find your chocolate), and stick it in the freezer to cool for a couple of hours. It only takes a couple of hours for them to cool, so you can make these kind of last minute, but just to be safe I usually let them sit in there over night. Anyways, I would totally recommend these for your party, because cakes can be sort of hit or miss - some girls don’t like certain flavors, some just won’t allow themselves to eat cake because they think it’s by default too fat (which is ridiculous). But honestly, what girl doesn’t love chocolate, and little chocolate penises, no less?

-Olivia

Cookie Cutters

Geez, last time it was cupcakes, and now cookies. You would think I don’t make cakes at all! Well, I don’t think I have any other items to share with you that I use for making cakes, so I’m going through different things I use to make other penis-shaped food. Today I’ll show you the cookie cutters I use.

These cookie cutters work great for making penis-shaped cookies for bachelorettes. They’re not really anything special, but they’re sturdy and reliable and there’s three different sizes which can actually be really useful. The smallest size works good for making cookies to put on top of cakes sometimes. As for the other ones, I usually make a batch or two of penis-shaped cookies to have at the party in addition to a cake. Sometimes if it doesn’t seem like there’s going to be a lot to do, I even bring frosting and sprinkles and other things so the girls can decorate their own cookies. It’s actually really fun, especially if everyone’s a bit tipsy. Just make sure nobody’s too drunk or they could make a huuuge mess... and nobody wants to clean that up! Cookies are always great to have for people to munch on if you haven’t brought the cake out yet or if it’s already gone. They tend to last a pretty long time.

-Olivia

Cupcake Pans

So, I’ve been talking a lot about penis-shape cakes (obviously), and I’ve talked about a couple of different pans. But there’s a kind I’ve neglected to mention so far. Something a little different than the usual penis cake: cupcakes. Sometimes, you don’t want to make a full cake for a bachelorette. It probably makes it feel too much like a birthday party, which it isn’t. So when I’m in the right mood or the bride-to-be requests it, I switch it up and make cupcakes instead. Here’s the pan I use for that.

There’s only six molds in the pan, and you’ll probably want to make more than just six cupcakes. You could just do six at a time, but I personally have three of these, so that when I make cupcakes for a party I can save some time. I’m usually making the cakes the day of the party, so they’re really fresh. But I don’t want to risk running too late with them, so I’ve got more pans than just one. But you can do whatever you want. Anyways, if you or your bachelorette is a fan of cupcakes or you just want smaller finger foods for the ladies at your party, this is the cake pan I’d recommend for making those. Oh, and a tip, it isn’t non-stick so you’ll have to spray it down before baking.

-Olivia

Disposable Pans

So I was thinking, and chances are most of you out there don’t share my passion for baking. You might just want to make a penis-shaped cake for a party and then never have anything to do with them again. And while that greatly saddens me (not really), I understand where you’re coming from. The uses of a penis cake pan are limited. It’s not like you can re-use it at a kid’s birthday party! So if you only expect to make one or two cakes, you don’t need to get a reusable pan like I have. If you want to save some money, you can just get this set of 2 disposable cake pans.

And if you want a slightly bigger cake, like my jumbo cake pan makes, there’s a set of 2 jumbo disposable pans as well. It looks the same, but it’s a couple inches bigger. And again, it’s cheaper than the reusable jumbo pan. So if you want to be done with baking penis cakes forever (or at least for the foreseeable future) after your bachelorette party, this is probably the way to go.

-Olivia

Another cake pan

Wow, I was looking back at that post from last week again and I just want to say sorry again. I was acting like a total bitch. But I’m not going to get into that any more, so anyways.

Today I just want to show you another penis-shaped cake pan that I use sometimes. Here it is:

You can find it here. It’s a bit smaller than the jumbo cake pan I use, so I wouldn’t recommend it for a large party, but it can feed about eight or ten people, in my experience. There isn’t really much special to say about it, I just use it sometimes to switch things up, since it’s a little differently shaped from the others. There are quite a few pans out there to choose from based on your personal preference of shape, so I’ll show you some more as I find them. That’s all for now!

-Olivia

I'm Sorry

No real post today. I just want to apologize for my last post. I had other problems going on in my life and I took it out on the blog. I was misdirecting my anger. I have nothing against boob-shaped cake pans, and the people who called me out on being a hypocrite are right. If I can bake my penis-shaped cakes, guys are just as entitled to their boob-shaped ones. I hope that last outburst won’t stop any of you from reading my blog. Sorry again.

-Olivia

Something for the guys...

Why are guys so immature?

I was out running with my boyfriend earlier today, and we were talking about the blog. He knows I make penis-shaped cakes, and he thinks it’s absolutely hilarious. Of course he does. Well, today he suggested I see if there are any boob-shaped cake pans. Because, you know, I have to be fair to both sexes. He started on some bs rant about gender equality and all that. In short, he doesn’t know what he’s talking about and was just trying to piss me off. Well, guess what, it worked. And here you go, for all the guys out there demanding gender equality, here’s your damn boobie cake pan.

There you go. Happy now? I hope you choke on it.

Ladies, I’m sorry. This probably isn’t really that big of a deal, and I’m just overreacting. And I probably shouldn’t be posting this while I’m still angry at him. I’m sure I’ll regret it. But the men have to have their boobie cake pan asap. Ugh, there are just so many ways he’s immature sometimes. It’s like I’m dating a child. He knows I’m not really angry about this, and he and I both know what I’m really angry about. And he still won’t apologize. Oh well, that’s not what this blog is for, so I’m not going to get into that. That’s all for now, enjoy your boobie cake pans, you immature little boys.

-Olivia